How To Implode

by The Pardos

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05:25
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04:57
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03:29

credits

released June 1, 2016

Songs written, composed, produced, and performed by Adam Rudy
Cover photo and design by Adam Rudy

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The Pardos Queens, New York

The Pardos are a folk rock duo from Queens, NY. Taking their name from legendary TV announcer Don Pardo, Adam Rudy (vocals, guitar) and Ben Schiery (vocals, accordion) write songs about love, loneliness, and space.

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Track Name: Can You Hear Me Now?
I wanna stop writing sad songs
About feeling like I’m dying
Or being alone, or staying at home
On a Friday night
It’s time for me to get it together
I wanna stop writing sad songs
These basement tapes I can’t escape
They’re gonna come back to haunt me

Can you hear me now?
I feel so drowned out
Can you hear me now?
And would I want you to?
Would I want you to?

I wanna stop writing bad songs
About the way I feel
I wanna feel fine but it’s still gotta rhyme
And it’s gotta be real
Thyself you heal, feeling better
I wanna stop writing bad songs
And learn to face the human race
And do things nonchalantly

What am I trying to say?
I never really know
I never really know
But I want to be heard anyway
But I never really know
Why? I just don’t know
Track Name: If I Should Die So Young
If I should die before I exploit my art
Please sell these basement tapes
I’ll not try for fidelity or clarity or quality
But just put the price tag on my name
If I should die before I break through to your heart
Please play these basement tapes
The hymns of love I wrote to you
That I had the shame to withhold
If I should die so young

Every song I ever wrote
Recorded in my home and never tried to sell
Drag them out into the world
That rightly had rejected everything else

Let my memory
Fuel the industry
Fall in love with me
With my memory
With my memory

But I died before you were born
My bitter mind and my body torn
Apart by needles and guns
Chalk up another posthumous number one
Chalk up another posthumous number one
Chalk up another posthumous number one

If I should die before I fall out of vogue
Please box up these basement tapes
Put them to wax, remixed and remastered
And profit from my pain
If I should before I lose control
Please disseminate these basement tapes
Let the proceeds go to broken homes
And to my estate
Track Name: Disarray
Like a poet, I have pretensions
I need you to look beyond the action to the intention
What I say is not what I mean
Because I never really know just what I mean
Like a record, broke, I repeat
I want you to look beyond the monster, look to me
What I say is not how I feel
Because I never really know just how I feel

Read between the lines
As you read my mind
As you read my mind to me

I wanna be okay
But I look so good in disarray
Yeah I look so good with empty eyes and a lack of faith
I wanna be okay
But I look so good in disarray
Yeah I look so good in disarray

Like a martyr, I’ve been a symbol
It wasn’t the great and if I’m honest felt a little sinful
God, I’m bored and sad and tired
I’m tired

If anything
This song
If anything
Is about me being wrong
About anything
And everything
About anything at all
Track Name: Riptide
I remember when you told me you were leaving for the day
That’s not okay
Cuz what am I to do but hang around and rattle all my chains?
Just like every other day
It’s funny how I thought I could trust you
It’s funny how I thought I could love you

You lock the basement door as if I would want to go
When you leave me alone
I hear the birds outside but I would rather sit in the shadows
Waiting for you to come home
I thought I could trust you
I thought you loved me too

Drown me in the riptide, baby
Drown me somewhere off the shore
Drown me so you don’t feel crazy
If that’s your concern
Bury me underground, baby
Heartbeats underneath your floor
No, I’ll never leave you baby
You know I love you more

The days are long when you’re away and I’ve got nothing much to do
Subterranean lovesick blues
You’ve got old newspapers and Rockford Files on VHS but soon
I’m gonna get tired of waiting for you
I thought I could trust you

You hurt me badly
I took it gladly
But now I find that sadly, I’m nothing more to you
Than dollars and senseless violence
Two whole years so meaningless
Your indifference, my ignorance
I guess I’m just, I guess I’m just
A pawn

I would wait forever, baby
To see you come right through that door
The only cage that keeps me, baby
Is all I’m waiting for
You told me that you loved me, baby
You told me that you loved me, baby
You told me that you loved me, you said
That you loved me more
Track Name: Everything Will Be Alright
Decaffeinated Coke
Your latest cloud of smoke
Sitting on the floor
Re-telling Carlin’s jokes
Your apathy realized
In half-remembered punchlines
It’s such a chore

But you didn’t seem to mind
Just staying in
Oh, it’s cold outside
And either way, we were fine
Either way

I hate to think about the days
We wasted being stupid
Not knowing what we were doing
Back before I learned to sing
We wanted to be rock stars
Or at least to have cars
Hanging around and doing nothing
And I hate to think about that
Because I know we’ll never get it back

Don’t tell me, I know
About all the songs I wrote
About all of this
And about letting go
But it hangs on me some days
And you really don’t erase
What you dismiss

The ones that seem to stay
Stuck in my mind
And it’s so cliche
But either way, I think we stayed
Okay
Track Name: That Bothers Me
I can’t grow a beard
And that bothers me
I can’t get from there to here
And that bothers me
I can’t ever wake up on time
And that bothers me
I can’t get you off my mind
And that bothers me

I’ve got a lot to say to you
If you want me to
But you’re so far away from me
Literally and figuratively
Literally and not literally

And that bothers me
And that bothers me
And that bothers me
But it doesn’t seem to bother you

The government is a joke
And that bothers me
For some reason people still smoke
And that bothers me
You don’t requite my love
And that bothers me
Around you, I’m always quite dumb
And that bothers me

You know you’re always on my mind
But I’m just not worth your time
You’re so far away from me
Track Name: Drywall
Answering machine tape tied me up
And I am hanging
From the ceiling, up in the air
Second guessing progress, every step forward met
With another regression
And I guess, I guess, I guess

I guess I’m doing okay
I guess I’m fine
Or at least learning how to survive

Staring at the plastic, metal, glass
Of what I’m worth
To those who care, and those who don’t
Snow falls from the ceiling, drywall flakes catch in my throat
And leave me ragged
And I guess, I guess, I guess

I guess I’m doing okay
I guess I’m fine
Or at least getting better with time

I never enjoyed folk music
I never felt like I belonged
I hate the sound of my voice
And I hate the way I’m getting along